The Cape Canaveralesque control panel (consisting of about three lights) was in utter disarray, lights shone where they shouldn’t and a sense of panic was creeping over me at a rate of knots.
Had this disaster occurred on a submarine my fellow submariners would be praying to their dear and fluffy lords, wishing to see their families one last time and declaring undying love to best friends, safe in the knowledge that death would shroud their awkwardness.
I promptly disconnected the wires from the solar panel and then set about checking the wiring behind the access panel. My mind raced backwards over the previous wiring installation looking for a trace of a mistake, some slip or oversight that might indicate why my control panel was going mental on me.
Think. Breathe slowly and think. Had I not followed my diagram to the letter? Had I not taken extra time to ensure my wiring job was impeccable? Sure I had. Hadn’t I?
I couldn’t see anything amiss at the battery end; all the terminals were connected as they should have been and all the markers on the wires were true to their origins. So what the f**k was going on here?
I sat down on the unfinished seating area with the wiring diagram and studied it carefully to see if I’d made a mistake there. Nothing. It was flawless.
Such is the chaos of electricity; a non physical entity which clouds the thoughts and corrupts the equilibrium of time and space. I despaired and looked back at the control panel one last time. And then I saw that nothing was amiss, the lights were off and the regulator reported no problems.
I got up and looked at the crimped ends of the solar panel loom. I had made a mistake after all. Like an anxious child I had dickishly overlooked the wiring colours when connecting the loom from the solar panel to the regulator and simply wired them the wrong way round.
Thankfully the regulator was forgiving and no harm was done but I didn’t afford myself the same luxury. A bout of self-flagellation should put it right. Who knows, I may even enjoy it.
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